26th August 2016,
To: My Favourite Jewish Girl
I am listening to love is a losing game on repeat again, and I cannot seem to rid myself of the thought that is you and what you have been through. I wanted to apologise for all the albums that you couldn’t release – all the people that didn’t believe in you – all the hearts that couldn’t be yours. I wonder every now and then where your soul is resting in this boundless universe, but one thing is for certain: that you’re at peace. You deserved so much more. All your pseudo fans lining up at your last concert have probably long forgotten you and moved on with their inevitable obsession of other songwriters. But you weren’t an obsession for me. You are a way of life. Judgement, expectations, demands all thrown your way – but you lived the life you wanted to live; a dream. I salute you. I respect you.
I do not judge you. I can relate to the attempt of allowing yourself the liberty that those surrounding you deprived you of. I do not think you were a drug addict. Rather, an artist. Tears dry on their own has begun playing, and I can understand the pain you must have gone though. Your publicist must have thought of you as a heartbroken drunk, but I’m guessing the poetic justice of your writings must have been too complex to be comprehended by a normal person. Why was the shade blue? I think about it sometimes. Did the blue represent your spiral of sadness and sorrow – or was the colour portraying the coldness, the stillness, of your heart?
I wouldn’t know. I haven’t had the same experiences as you. Neither has anyone else. Is that why they wanted to throw you into rehab? I do not think you are sick. I think your old soul has consumed your young body, and had to formulate its escape from the destiny that was your life. Just how he can only hold her, I believe you were referring to the soul that captured your body – but could only maintain its grasp temporarily. Does it matter? Not really. People want to accept the simplest explanation. They refuse to volunteer for a lifelong diary of interpretation of every passage, every word. If so, I do not consider myself a person. What was the girl agitated about? I guess I’ll never really know. Valerie might know.
You’re wondering now is one of my favourites. The upbeat and rigid vocals of the song really add flare to the mood in the air. Are you always this perky? I don’t think that this is the end, rather a start. You are a free soul. Rejuvenate yourself into the jazz queen you once were. Revive into a blossoming flower of twilight and mystery. Begin your new beginning. I believe in you.